Heyyy so I had a whole newsletter about cozy books for fall or whatever (not whatever, it's actually very important to me and will be forthcoming), but unfortunately last night at approximately 10:30pm, my friend
sent me the following:And the thing is, I dropped my phone on my collarbone. This is the kind of mess I live for, because why are you, an established, well-respected political reporter, risking it all for Robert F. Kennedy, Jr., he of the brain worms and dead bears? He of the journals detailing all the ways in which he cheated on his second wife, he of the anti-vax beliefs, he who proudly counts Roseanne Barr and Zachary Levi as supporters?
That’s the guy you choose to put your career on the line for?
Astonished doesn’t even begin to cover it. Here’s what New York had to say about it:
It is so deranged I cannot help but be fascinated by it. Like, I stop thinking about it for a minute and then I have to return to it, because in what world would you choose to interact with someone like RFK Jr. outside of the very discrete confines of your job? Everything I know about him, from a personal and political standpoint, would prompt me to escape his presence the second I was allowed to.
Nuzzi released a statement in response: “Earlier this year, the nature of some communication between myself and a former reporting subject turned personal. During that time, I did not directly report on the subject nor use them as a source. The relationship was never physical but should have been disclosed to prevent the appearance of a conflict. I deeply regret not doing so immediately and apologize to those I’ve disappointed, especially my colleagues at New York.”
Meanwhile, Kennedy’s statement: "Mr. Kennedy only met Olivia Nuzzi once in his life for an interview she requested, which yielded a hit piece."
To risk it all for texts! The very idea of Kennedy’s texting banter makes my stomach turn. Imagining that she had some sort of secret contact name for him has made a twitch find a temporary home in my left eye.
And then, the shock did not allow my face to rest because I found out that Nuzzi is my age! A woman my age did this! Much like RFK's worm did upon finding itself in the food desert that was its host's cranial cavity, I broke upon hearing the news. A fellow 1993-er!
It terrified me, so I then had to ask myself, reader, because as a reminder I remain an empath: could there ever come a time when I, too, would be lured by the appeal of a man such as this, knowing everything I know about him?
And listen, as someone who grew up on HBO shows and went to grad school, I have been attracted to my fair share of questionable men. But I have looked inward and I hope to God it won’t later be considered hubris when I say: I would rather live through the heartbreak of daily Bennifer break-up announcements for the rest of my life than to even toy with the idea of letting anything but distance come between myself and Robert F. Kennedy, Jr.
I was too wired after the reveal and the frantic texting to all of my friends, so at approximately 12:50 a.m. I fully gave up on Morpheus and searched for the Kennedy profile Nuzzi published for New York back in November, wondering if I could pinpoint the moment when Nuzzi said hmmmm you know what, there might be something there ... something to explore ... something about which to have communications of a personal nature.
A close read of the profile followed, my eyebrows hitching higher and higher with every paragraph. Did the turn happen when Kennedy drove her to the trailhead (they were going hiking and granted, this was before the dead bear thing became known) in a car dubbed "the death machine," which "smell[ed] so bad [Nuzzi] thought [she] might pass out after about 15 seconds riding shotgun?" Maybe. Something hot, perhaps, about a 70-year-old man with an underdeveloped olfactory sense?
Or perhaps it was when he described Steve Bannon, one of the few political figures who actually looks less tethered to the land of the living than Kennedy, as a "smart" man who "also shared some of [Kennedy's] views about the pandemic?" Girlies, is it attractive when a guy is impressed by the person who through his running of Breitbart News brought the alt-right to the forefront? Open-mindedness, after all, is soooo important.
But no. Maybe the moment Nuzzi said ... unless? was when she discovered that even the Trump White House called Kennedy's anti-vax claims "delusional." Delusion … or critical thinking, wondered Nuzzi. A man after Aaron Rodgers’ own heart.
I am dearly hoping The Cut does what it does best and lets Nuzzi pen the most unhinged personal essay it has ever published. We need it.
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I’m 64 and I want to send this to someone but I don’t know anybody who cares but me!
"than to even toy with the idea of letting anything but distance come between myself and Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. " is such a perfectly phrased sentence. I myself am a 1972 person, and the mental shenanigans of that man have been known for decades. Decades. He is brain worms personified, and as dateable as Martin Shkreli, which is to say not at all.